The four & The one

Saturday, 5 November 2016
I'm most grateful for you, each and everyone of you. You all have thought me about myself and the different kind of love I can give and get. 

To my first love

I met you when I was 12 fell for you when I was 14/15. One might say I was too young to know what love was but I know that what I felt for you was love. I loved you with every bone in my body, I could have done anything for you. I did everything within my power to make you happy. I was so consumed by you that it became so obsessive that it took me five years to get over you. You taught me how deeply I could love a human, how I can be so mesmerised by a person. 

To my soulmate

I call you my soul mate because that's what you are to me. Soulmates have a reason and a season and sadly yours has passed but I'm grateful for the short time we spent together. I've never felt so connected to anyone in my life. It was like I knew you in a past life. With you I didn't feel any awkwardness whatsoever. The comfort-ability I felt was not in a bad way but the good kind, I felt like I was home with you. You taught me how it was possible to feel an intense connection to a person. You showed me the intensity of my feelings.

To the one I thought was my forever.

Out of the four, I've know you the longest. (Well I taught I did). I knew you right after my first love. Always saw you as a big brother but years passed and we grew up and feelings changed. My feelings for you were so intense, so intense to change my ideologies. I was willing to change my world so I could I accommodate you. You made me sound and act crazy, I mean crazier than I've ever acted before. With you I understood why people chose to be with one person forever. You taught that it is possible to be with one person forever and be happy. You made me realise that my so called "fear of commitment" and my fear of "long distance" was a myth. You taught me that there might be someone who is better than your current partner but if you love that person it won't matter. You would be so consumed by that person that you won't care. You felt like my forever and I didn't want to change that but unfortunately life had other plans.  

To the one who showed me what love was

To the one who I wished I could have fallen for, to the one whose feeling weren't returned by me, I'm sorry cause I know how bad heart break can be. You taught me that a relationship, a partnership is suppose to be easy. That I'm not meant to cry when you I think of my partner. You showed me its suppose to be full of laughs and silly arguments. You showed me how feels to be appreciated by someone who cares about you.

To the One

I don't know who you are or what you look like. I might have already met you already, heck you might be one of the four mentioned. The information is all unknown and classified but what I do know is that, you would be everything described here and more. I would feel so connected to you, you would make me realise that my first love wasn't real love and that my forever was just "right now". It didn't work out with either one of the four because it wasn't meant to be. I cannot wait to meet you and love you in ways I didn't know were possible. I cannot wait to embark on  this journey called life with you, I love you.

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